What do you do when a new year comes around, you turn 40, and you need to blow off some steam? Write an awesome new blog of course! This one is by far our least literal, most hilarious, and possibly the most rewarding blog to date..Ooooo!! We don’t know for sure, but what we do know is that YOU should read it as soon as humanly possible! If you are not a human or aren’t into reading silly things that just might teach you a thing or two, this blog will most likely anger, disappoint and cajole you! But you should still consider reading it anyway! Cheers to your special mock-tales of the future!